A few years back a friend and I, let’s call him Mike, decide we are going squirrel hunting. Now I wasn’t raised a die-hard hunter so I never really had the chance to go all that much and I hadn’t felt the kick of a shotgun in a while.

We got there early, walked what seemed like a hundred miles and we didn’t see a dad gum thing! After a few hours we decided there is nothing to hunt today so we should call it quits. (But I want to shoot this shotgun so bad I can’t stand it.) Right before we leave the woods I spot a bird in an oak tree. I raise my gun, steady my aim and POW! Something falls to the ground so Mike and I go to check it out.

What the heck? It’s a…It’s a squirrel!

Apparently I missed the bird because he is nowhere to be found, but I killed a squirrel that I never even saw. Mike says “Good shot Wayne. I never even saw it.” I looked at Mike not knowing how to play the situation.

Do I tell him “Thanks man, it was nothing.”  or do I tell him “Don’t feel bad, I didn’t see it either.”? That would reveal that not only did I miss my target with a shotgun at close range, but also that I’m capable of killing stuff by accident and for his own safety, he will never invite me hunting again.

Hmmmm! What should I do?

So I tell him “Mike, I was actually shooting at a bird, but I saw the squirrel off to the side behind him. There are precisely 32 pellets in this shotgun shell and they can get expensive, so I went with two for one method. I figured that if I angled my gun at 24 degrees Northwest of my target I should hit the bird with at least 50% of the pellets dead center which converts to 16 pellets. That leaves 8 pellets to the right and 8 pellets to the left which is where my secondary target is located, which should absorb 50% of the remaining 8 pellets within a 16 inch circumference. That means 4 pellets should hit that target dead center. I only need one pellet to kill the squirrel so by rotating the barrel 9 more degrees to the left the pattern of the remaining 4 pellets should provide me a 50% shot at the kill zone radius. The rest was just pure luck.”

He just looked at me, scratched his head and said “You didn’t see it either did you?” I said “No.”