Many years ago I was rearranging the furniture in my office at a finance office I was managing. All the wiring was run through conduit along the top of the floor. So to move the furniture, I also had to rearrange the conduit. I took this one piece apart and started pulling what I thought was slack in the wire. Turns out it wasn’t slack at all and all I was doing was stretching the dang wire. 

I stretched it so thin that the plastic coating on the wire broke and touched the conduit creating huge sparks, a lot of smoke and of course what felt like 33.7 million volts of raw electricity that ran through my body.

The next thing I remember was lying on my back, twitching like a fish out of water, opening my eyes and seeing smoke. As the smoke began to clear I saw two figures hovering over me. Their faces began to come into focus and I thought to myself, 

“This can’t be heaven cause those are two of the ugliest dang angels I have ever seen. Please God, I wasn’t all that bad, was I? Don’t answer that.”

Anyway, they reached out their hands toward me and all I could do was yell “GET AWAY FROM ME DEMONS!” Turned out it was only my two co-workers checking to see if I was alive. Apparently I was still pretty charged up when they took my hand to help me up because the hair on both their heads stood straight up.

For about an hour I would sneak up on them, touch their hand and watch the hair rise. Must be my magnetic personality. I’m just sayin’.